My parents and grandparents just came back from holidays today. My brother gave away the fact that I didn't go to work at my current workplace (none of my family knows I took up a second job).My mum was screaming her head off at me, declaring that I was a major liar cause I told her that I'm not free as I'll be working almost everyday. Then she decided to start pointing out every flaw of mine again. At least I'm not as crazy as I am, I stopped getting worked up at everything she said, I didn't even bother to correct her anymore. I just let her vent her frustration, no point telling her that I'm actually taking another job, she wouldn't believe me and she'll definitely see it as rebelling. Sometimes I really wonder, people always tell us that nobody is perfect, but when we point out the elder's mistakes, it's either considered rebellious or rude. I learnt my lesson after so many years, I'll just let them say what they want. If they ever find out I took up 2 jobs without telling them, I will just say I forgot and shut up after that. I know they'll have alot of things to comment about.

No joke that sometimes, I'll lose my cool and yell alongside with them. That was mostly in the past when I'm still a childish kid who can't control her emotions. Now I'm mostly aiming to be emotionless. Since the day I've decided to stop acting immature, I haven't flared up at anyone yet. There are times when I almost did, almost. There are so many things going on in my mind that I can feel the string being pulled harder and harder, to the extent that it's going to snap soon. I wonder what will become of me if it really snaps. Will IMH decides that I'm too insane for them? I wonder, I really do.